Movie review-Green Lantern, shining a little light on good versus evil, sorry not evil, really, really ugly
I was never a great reader of comic books, well that's not strictly true, my father was not a great fan of comic books so they were to a large extent one of many, oh so many, forbidden pleasures, indeed I still remember the pity shown to me by the Amish kids at school who thought that my father's position on suitable entertainment for a teenager was a little old fashioned.
Any road up, on the occasions when I was wriggling through the chimneys in the big houses owned by the posh folk (who had a more liberal approach to the graphic novel) I did manage to sneak a look at the occasional comic.
I was always impressed by Green Lantern, I liked the idea of the corps, a league of defenders of the galaxy, it seemed nice to m
e, as a socially inept, introverted and imaginative kid that, rather than the loneliness of a spider/super or bat there was a hero support mechanism that spanned the galaxy.
I therefore had high hopes for this movie but was quite prepared to put up with a lot for old times sake. Mrs Stuffy, contrari-wise had low expectations, which were well met. The special effects are impressive but these days that's a given, special effects aren't really all that special, the alien worlds were well realised and thoughtful although with the prevalence of the colour green I wasn't surprised to read that they'd replaced traditional green-screen cgi with a blue based version.
Without exception the characters are not deep and the storyline is immensely predictable. There's a troubled and very unattractive villain with father issues. There's a troubled hero with father issues, (no wonder I related to it) courage issues ( no wonder I related to it) and commitment issues (you get the picture) who saves the Earth (and probably the Universe) thanks to some deeply insightful advice (basically "you have father, courage and commitment issues!") from probably the most insipid and unenthusiastic love interest ever.
Miss Lively (a clear example of inappropriate naming) should take some lessons in acting from the talented Ms Dunst for Spiderman, and Ms Portman in Thor, who have set the bar high for those who aim to love a superhero. That said I enjoyed the film, Ryan Reynolds is not a great screen presence but he's amusing and likeable, the story, although silly ( if there's 3600 superhero Green Lanterns available, letting the new, troubled and semi-articulate raw recruit take on the mega-baddie and his very unattractive minion seems to be an odd command decision, and frankly if you're many centuries old and the guardians of the universe, I expect you to have worked out that two wrongs don't make a right, making a ring out of fear? that's not a bright move chaps!
Hey ho, they needed to set up the next film in the series, hope it works out.
A haiku produced through the power of pure will... (which is green by the way)
On Earth, jet and plot
in space, no one can hear you
asking "you did what?"
Labels: oakwood stuffy movie review green lantern barn
Chicken update, what becomes of the post menopausal hen?
For the benefits of those who've been mail-bombing me with demands for updates on the chicken situation here at the Barn I felt is appropriate to pen this update. As you'll remember if you've been paying attention over the years about two years ago we bought a purple Eglu, (a plastic wipe-clean chicken coop) and subsequently three hens , a brown,stupid chicken Bessie, a white stupid chicken and a black stupid chicken (Cassie). They were quickly joined by a the sole survivor from a fox attack on a neighbour's flock, another stupid (but lucky) brown one, Choclit.
We lost Jessie, the white, quite traumatically, to a sudden localised outbreak of dog, and as a result built a compound, 'the velociraptor cage', to give them a relatively safe roaming area. It's been the target of a series of unprovoked incursions by the local fox population, so far without any serious damage beyond constant hole and tunnel filling by yours truly, Farmer Grumpy.
So now, two yea
rs on, what's afoot? well chickens live for 4-5 years but only lay eggs for two, which means the yield of eggy goodness has started to noticeably drop and the girls look a little apprehensive whenever I roam the woods with an an axe or roasting dish. They need not worry, I'm informed by "The Women of the Barn" that it will be very poorly received if I offer up 'Bessie in a White wine sauce', or anything similar. So it appears that the purple eglu will now become a poultry retirement home and I've purchased a new Eglu, (not available in Purple alas) and today assembled it in anticipation of the new wave of Oakwood chickens, scheduled to arrive in a couple of weeks. Click the photo to watch the exploits of an acknowledged king of botched DIY making the easy look difficult.
I'll keep you posted when the new girls arrive.
Labels: oakwood barn stuffy chickens omlet eglu smallholding
Movie Review - X Men First class, second thoughts, third rate ?
Now I am, as you'll know my loyal follower, not averse to a comic book superhero movie so I dragged Mrs Stuffy, kicking and screaming, to the local magic picture house to enjoy or (in her case) tolerate the prequel to X-men, Xmen 2 and Wolverine, all, to my mind, fine films, (X-men final stand, hmm, not so much).
The latest in the franchise is produced by the team behind the excellent Kick-Ass, Matthew Vaughan and Jane Goldman. Although it's a pleasant enough movie it felt, to me, to be lacking something and I spent a sleepless night trying to work out what was wrong with it.
The issue, I suspect, is the prequel trap, George Lucas fell into it big-time and now Matthew Vaughan has too.
We know what's going to happen, we know the outcomes, who these folk will turn into and we're looking for clues, pivotal predictable moments, we don't, almost by definition get surprises. In addition it's the tale of young superheroes, therefore mostly played by young actors, as a result the characters feel thin, unformed, unimpressive. The look of the movie, early James Bond, works fine, it's nicely judged as a period piece but it's the actors who should make it more than a style statement, for me the screen only really lit up when Hugh Jackman made a 10 second cameo appearance, the rest of the movie was pleasant enough fare but, sadly, too shallow, too weak, too lacking in surprise, passion and spice, to engage this very particular reviewer.
I had to rouse Her Ladyship from well deserved slumber to discover her views, I'll not share them if you don't mind.
A first class Haiku ?
So, unlike revenge
Superhero movies are
A dish best served hot
Labels: stuffy oakwood movie review haiku xmen barn
Movie reviews, Spring special offer, two for the price of one
Fantasy double bill, Thor and Pirates of the Carib, the Fourth.
Thor - a surprise for those expecting the life-story of Miss Aherd
I'm fairly sure that I wouldn't want to spend an evening in the company of Kenneth Branagh. There, I said it. I'm not sure why, there's just something about him that doesn't appeal but I do have to admit the lad can make a damn fine movie.
I was initially sceptical about Thor, like the aforementioned Ken, he was never one of my favourites. As comic book heroes, go I always lumped Thor with characters like the Hulk and the Thing, dependent on brute force and lacking the elegance and subtlety of Batman, Green Lantern or the Silver Surfer.
I was reluctantly swayed by a couple of positive reviews and I'm now very glad that her ladyship and I girded our heroic loins, polished our breastplates and battled the frost giants of Camberley to make it to the multiplex. I'm not going to bang on about the special effects, or the well structured story, or the over the top-ness of those playing the Asgardians, let's face it, this is a story that cries out for 'over the top', but the engaging part of the film is some fine performances, from Natalie Portman, as the very understated love interest, by Stellan Skarsård as 'the explainer of all things Nordic' and crucially from Chris Hemsworth as Thor, presumably chosen for his looks, (the ladies seemed impressed), he nuances the classic tale of fallen ego, discovery of humility, self deprecating humour, and inevitable redemption very, very nicely.
Skaal for a frostbitten haiku
Frost giants and wars
For better or for Norse, Thor
Wins the day, of course...
and a brief excursion to the neverending pirate saga - Pirates of the Caribean Four - on Stranger tides
The fourth instalment in this never-ending story swaps Ian Mcshane for Bill Nighy as chief baddy, swaps Penelope Cruz for Kiera Knightley, (an enormous improvement) and drops Orlando Bloom (no great loss, sorry ladies) from the team.
The movie is of course absolutely dependent on Johnny Depp's predictable but engaging performance to make it watchable.
Apart from that this is a really easy film to critique.
Did you like Pirates of the Carribean 1?
Did you like Pirates of the Carribean 2?
Did you like Pirates of the Carribean 3?
Then you'll almost certainly like this one ...
A haiku from the high seas, why ever not?
What kind of pirate
'spite penchant for violence, leaves
Cruz on an island?
Thankee shipmates...
e, as a socially inept, introverted and imaginative kid that, rather than the loneliness of a spider/super or bat there was a hero support mechanism that spanned the galaxy.
