Thursday, September 14, 2006

Hey Moron! there's a line here...


There's a cunning scheme operating at Waterloo station to enable people to get into taxis 4 times faster than would otherwise be the case, it's very simple, 4 marked bays, with 4 posts (standing next to, for the purpose of), numbered, logically, 1-4. A moment's observation would inform any organism with an IQ higher than algae that if the clients could arrange themselves in sets of four, the taxis could also batch themselves thus reducing queuing time by around 15 minutes for every twenty.
Incredibly this seems to be too complex for the majority of the queue loving public. It may be that my arrival yesterday morning coincided with a large party on the way to some convention of village idiots, or it may be that people really are too stupid to be allowed to choose from 4 places to stand. Curiously, the speed with which people got into cabs, changed their minds and left the queue or simply ran away very quickly increased dramatically when I got near the front of the line and start explaining to these imbeciles how the ****ing process works,in the calm, measured and reasonable terms for which I'm reknowned.

1 Comments:

At 8:47 am, Anonymous Steve the software said...

This is commonly known as the herd instinct. I kid you not when I tell you that I once had the unnerving experience of seeing the 297 bus overtake me going down the Argyle Road towards West Ealing. The fact that you are neither familiar with the said bus, nor the Argyle Road is not significant. The point is that it should have turned left up Cleveland Road. What made this truly memorable was that it turned right at the next junction and disappeared into a housing estate. About a quarter of a mile up the road it crossed in front of me going in the opposite direction. I finally saw it again 10 minutes later heading towards Northfields (a good 2.5 miles off course at this stage). The thing that would capture the imagination of even Desmond Morris, was that the bus was full of people, all looking perplexed - I guess if one of them sttod up an pointed out to the problem to the driver, they would have received looks similar to those you received!

 

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